This is a late post because I’ve been in Northampton today at another one of Richard Wilkins’ Recharge Days. I’m not going go over the details because I’ve already blogged about the Recharge Days here. And talked about the concept of the Script here.
Because it’s late, and because I think it’s an important point to make, I just want to highlight one thing that Richard said which I hadn’t heard before and which really spoke to me. It’s about the impostor syndrome. You know that feeling that you are a fraud, that you’re not as good as you are making out, that perhaps you shouldn’t be in the position you have reached? I know that not everyone has this experience, but too many of us do. And it’s paralysing people, stopping them from reaching further, from making important contributions and having fulfilling lives.
Well, this, roughly speaking, is what Richard said to us about feeling like a fraud today:
‘Yes, people are frauds. But not because they are not as good as they make out. Because they are far, far more and better than they realise!’
How about that? What would it mean for you if you are ‘playing small,’ believing yourself to be less-than, if actually you were far, far more and better than you realise? If that were really true, what would you do differently? If that were true, just think how much you might be depriving the world of the wonderful contribution you could make.
And more generally, if this particular concept isn’t an issue for you, is there something that you are looking at in a negative way, that perhaps you are completely wrong about? So wrong, in fact, that you need to turn round 180 degrees and see that the truth is the exact opposite of what you believe? Just ask yourself, what would it be like if I believed the opposite? If nothing outside me changed, but my perspective changed, and my experience altered with it? Saturday evening food for thought.
If you’d like to find out more about Richard and the BC course check out his website here. And please keep in touch with me by subscribing to my newsletter – link below. Thank you!
Bloody hell, I have been here all night with the old one and fretting and now I am going to get my journal and write what if it was opposite to how I was feeling. Perfect
Love it Jacqui! So pleased!
That struck a chord with me today too Harriet. It’s this authenticity thing that I get hung up on wanting to do what feels right yet when I do the shining thing it feels so right, it’s just the voice that makes me shrink again.
Lovely to spend time with you last night and today with Richard. Xxx
Yes that pesky voice! I was so happy to see you and to share the day with you yesterday as well x
Sometimes I think it is not that we are not good enough, but that we are so much better than we think we can cope with!! Really enjoyed today and got so much from it xx
I suspect you are right Caroline! I enjoyed it too, good to see you x
Very nice tip.
It reminds me of the dreaded ‘fake it til you make it’ tip, which can work wonders but can also lead down some wrong paths if you are simply pretending falshoods to others.
In my life, I imagine what someone successful in the field would think. A specific person – I think of them, and then imagine myself in their shoes, and ask how they would think. That forces me to stop limiting myself by my own thoughts, and allows me to tap into this imposter benefit that you mention. (In fact I did it the other week doing a stand up comedy gig!)
Cheers,
Gordon
That’s helpful Gordon, thank you. I’m sure we’d love to see some videos of your gigs! By the way yes I agree, fake it till you make it has to be used, if at all, sensitively depending on the circumstances!