I’ve been thinking a lot recently about joy. Not happiness, which as I understand it depends more on circumstances outside us, so that we can have happy times and sad ones (or just less happy ones). Rather, that deep, indefinable feeling of it’s-good-to-be-alive or even its-fantastic-to-be-me that exists inside us and we can connect with whenever we want to, once we know about it.
Maybe it’s an age thing, or a spiritual path thing, because I’m sure that a few years ago I might have nodded in agreement with that first paragraph but I’m not certain I would have really understood those words. A lot of meditation, a lot of soul-searching and a good dose of surrender have now brought me to a place where joy is pretty much a part of most days. How wonderful!
Yesterday I was pondering on some of my areas of work which I feel less engaged by, less keen to get on with, than others. It occurred to me that this is probably because I have yet to find joy in them. Some of the work I do can be draining, demanding and in unpleasant surroundings. Clients are sometimes very angry and even abusive. It’s not fun, but I enjoy it. See that? “En-joy”. Somehow I find joy within me when I do this work. Something to do with being myself, feeling purposeful, knowing I am contributing, I think. There are other activities, perhaps less unpleasant on the face of it, which I also love doing. But somewhere, there is a fine line between all these enjoyable jobs and the ones that I might find easy, and I might be good at, but still feel like work. Some of them are to do with my work, and some are anything that resembles cleaning or tidying the house. I haven’t found the joy yet.
As so often, this pondering took place while I was driving. Moments later, I pulled into a car park and noticed a parked car with the registration plate “J-O-Y something-something-something” (I have no memory for figures). The message was so clear to me: there is joy absolutely everywhere – I just have to find the joy that is already there.
The good news is that I know joy is an inside job rather than depending on anything outside me, so this is one of the things I can be responsible for. I am convinced that, once I find joy in myself while doing something, that activity will no longer feel like work. I will feel energised and keen to do it, and everything will flow. How am I going to do this? Well, my hunch is to relax, not think too much, just leave the intention out there. Writing things down (here we are) always helps with that. I’m curious and interested, and open to new possibilities. Even with housework. I’ll know when it happens, and then I’ll get back to you! Have a great weekend everyone.
