At the beginning of the year, I thought about my impending holiday for which I had bought some swimwear. I knew that, during the second week, I would have time to spend next to swimming pools and on beaches, and I wanted to take full advantage of those opportunities. Before you scroll down, there will not be any pictures of me in my bikini, but I am a words person and I am happy to share my experience with you.
So I thought, in January, that I would exercise even more, get measured, eat clean and tone up a bit. I can’t change the fact that I am 51, only just taller than five foot and slightly pear-shaped, but I thought it would be nice to get into the best shape I could achieve. Then, life intervened. I wasn’t well and needed to take time to get better rather than spending time at boot camp, various classes and the gym. I was busy and distracted and my usually fairly healthy diet deteriorated. I skidded towards the departure date having lost weight because of all that had gone on but knowing that I hadn’t achieved my noble goals of being ‘bikini ready.’
I decided, therefore, that I would follow that sensible and down to earth advice about how to get a bikini body: ‘put a bikini on your body.’ People who know me well also know that I am not really terribly interested in appearance, so I decided to use this aspect of my personality to put aside, with determination, any concern about how I looked. I would embrace the lying-by-the-pool culture of the Hard Rock Hotel with enthusiasm. (Not to underestimate the importance, however, of exercise, good nutrition and a healthy lifestyle. All of those things are dear to me and I am in the process of re-prioritising!)
We were in Penang, a fantastic seaside holiday location, overlooking the largest free-form pool on the island, and to be honest it looked very inviting. I put one of my bikinis on my very pale self, filled in all the blanks with sunscreen and put a sundress over the top. I padded out through the lobby and found myself a shaded sunbed. In fact they were nearly all in the shade – it just wouldn’t be sensible or healthy to roast under that tropical sun for more than a few minutes. It does help when the pool area is arranged so that you have some sense of privacy, rather than being lined up with everyone else. But the inescapable truth is that, when you are on a sunbed next to a pool, you are lying down on something like a bed, wearing garments that are essentially smaller than underwear. For a rather reserved Englishwoman who doesn’t list sunbathing as one of her favourite things, this can feel a bit odd.
Determined to ‘live life to the edges,’ however, I pushed on through the odd feelings. I enjoyed the warmth and the slight breeze. I enjoyed the sight of the sunshine glinting through the palm leaves above me. I watched children playing in the fantastic pool. Of course, I took with me my Kindle, my notebook and my phone. An hour of just lying by the pool without all those distractions would be impossible! I did manage an hour, however, punctuated by dips in the pool, which was just slightly less warm than the air around us. The pool area is covered with sand, which is raked every morning, and even the floor of the pool is sandy, making the whole experience more seasidey and less artificially swimming-pool-like. Being a natural sort of person, I liked that.
In fact it was a very enjoyable hour. And it wasn’t the only time I spent by the pool while we were there. I refused to entertain any feelings of self-consciousness whatsoever, which greatly contributed to my enjoyment. I refused to allow any negative thoughts about my body or any aspect of my appearance. Before I learned that I can choose my thoughts and even my feelings, I would never have been able to make such decisions. But learning about choosing has given me the freedom to let go of those destructive thoughts. What a wonderful revelation!
If you are going on holiday this year, if you are an average woman and if you will be spending any time at all next to a pool, this is my gift to you. Make a decision to do your sunbathing with total self acceptance. Know that those negative thoughts are not yours and you don’t have to entertain them. Get your bikini body by putting a bikini on your body. Don’t spoil a second of your holiday with thoughts of ‘not good enough.’ You are perfect. Go out there and enjoy that sunshine!
Love this post Harriet, just what I needed to read today, Thank you :)
Glad it helped Kama. Thank you x
Love the concept of ‘filling in the blanks’ with sunscreen.
Most of my life I have stressed about how I look when really the underpinning fear was my over concern that others would be judging me as unacceptable.
I am 55. At least 2 stone overweight and after lots of surgery have scars. I even have one breast bigger than the other because of surgery. And it doesn’t matter a fiddlers cuss. I am alive and so grateful I can put on a swimsuit and go splash in a pool. So many others can’t. Xx
Thank you so much for sharing this. The gift is, as you say, to be here and to feel the air and the water and the joy. To miss that because of stuff that goes on between our ears and doesn’t matter is very sad xxx
Lovely! Definitely the best “get a bikini body” post I’ve seen!
Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it.