Today I’ve been working on the interview I did with Bharti Kerai last year, for the worry project. Bharti plays an important part in my story, because she taught me one of the techniques that has become central to my anti-worry approach and an invaluable piece of “first aid”.
I was particularly struck today by what Bharti had to say about awareness. “If you have awareness you have a chance”. In other words, only if you know that you worry, and why, and that it is a choice, can you then make the choice to do something about it. I encounter people all the time who think they have no choice other than to worry, and this makes me really sad because, as with any freedom, the potential for freedom from worry is locked away if we don’t believe we possess it.
A core element of my message is to try to show worriers that worrying is indeed a choice and that we all have the freedom to live in a different way.
Something else that Bharti touched on was accepting our worry. She explained that we can alleviate some of our worry straight away simply by accepting the fact that we worry and even deciding to like it. This stops the compound action of worrying about worry and allowing ourselves to feel pain simply because of the habit of worrying. If we just stop right there and say “ok, I’m worrying, and that’s alright with me”, then that’s a huge leap forward and a massive decrease in stress and inner conflict. And if we’re starting off with accepting our worrying, then of course I have a whole armoury of acceptance strategies, and I am always collecting more!
These are two important changes that we can all make right now. We can understand, and accept, that worry is a choice we make, albeit perhaps one that has become deeply ingrained as a habit, and therefore we have freedom to change our choices. And we can accept that we are worrying, agree not to fight it, and let it be for the moment. Simple, but not necessarily easy, and that’s why I’ve needed a holistic, multi-faceted approach, not a quick fix! More tomorrow…………
What a deep post – wow… thank you
Thanks for your comment.
Your post has definitely piqued my curiosity to learn more about your story and your journey! I love the part about acknowledging the worry, accepting it and then knowing we can choose to change it. Freedom really lies within our ability to choose, doesn’t it?
I’m so glad you are interested to know more. I’m posting about my journey and the book I’m working about all month!
When we are ready for change we will make a choice and become willing to do something different, no matter how difficult.
Yes! Thank you Mark. We have to want that change and then we are willing to do whatever it takes.